Thought about being a stand up comedienne for zombies, but when they eat you alive, they really eat you!! - Neil Leckman
I don't know why they call them Cheerios, I ate an entire box and didn't feel any happier!! - Neil Leckman
I sprayed my dog with off and he still sits in my favorite chair!! - Neil Leckman
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, unless it is the burning bush, in that case the value of your bird just went up!! - Neil Leckman
Remember never to text and drive, it's bad grammar, even if you have a deadline. You might cross the line and dead may be your destination. Think about it!! - Neil Leckman
Cheech and Chong Vs. HAL"I can't do that Dave.""Dave's not here, man""That does not compute. Dave""No man, Dave isn't here!!"..."I'm sorry Dave but that is incorrect""No man, Dave's not here!!""Daisy, daisy,.... I'm self terminating now Dave....""No man, dave's not.....Is he gone? - Neil Leckman
I have my moments, I just can't remember where I put them. - Neil Leckman
Asthmatic spewer of filth gasps, but clean air does not sufficeTo fuel fires fueled by thoughts got rottenLest we all be forgotten thingsThat sit like dust upon the mantel of her mind - Neil Leckman
Well they have to have something to wean Caluntians off Venusian moles. Seems humans are the best therapy, to consume that is. They say we are a bit gamey though. An acquired taste, one we hope not many acquire. - Neil Leckman
If a book falls in the woods and nobody read it, was it ever written? - Neil Leckman
I admit I once threw caution to the wind....It doesn't fly well!! - Neil Leckman
I have always pictured accupuncture like falling into a box of sewing needles, and then standing up refreshed and free of pain. - Neil Leckman
It lies here deep in the heart, the small chest of painSharp words like daggers placed it hereTo fill with hurtIn filling it grew heavy and drug me downFor to not feel is not to liveUntil I rest at last in dirtThe worst of you got the best of me… - Neil Leckman
Years ago there was an old man I knew that told me he didn't trust me, because people with beards were hiding from something. I told him, "That's true, I'm hiding from the barber!! - Neil Leckman
Yesterday I fell completely off the face of the earthContemplating life, light and love in the darkness of the voidStrangely it was in the dark that I found meaning for the light - Neil Leckman